Tips to Overcoming your Personal Financial Crisis

overcome challenges

Would you like to know the secret to overcoming your personal financial crisis?

How would your life be different when you no longer “worry” about where your cash will come from?

DC Cordova has assembled a list of 10 distinctions she’s learned from her own personal path, distinctions that have served her well through many years of entrepreneurship and business development.  From the upcoming book, Walking With the Wise: Overcoming Obstacles, this excerpt includes some of the most powerful habits of surviving difficult financial times.

1. Know that this is about YOU. It’s not about the economy. There are many people making money when others are not.

2. Determine what you are good at and what will bring you money now. Not later – now! Don’t worry about the tasks. Some of us had to roll up our sleeves and do jobs we had paid others to do for many years.

3. Focus on income generating activities. Let go of all those things that waste your time and don’t bring in the cash flow that you need.

4. Tighten up your belt. No new clothes, cars, or any other doodas that are not going to create money for you. You now spend money only on those things that will make you more money.

5. When you’re done with your personal financial crisis, keep your agreements and pay everyone back. If you cannot do that for years, create new agreements as necessary.

6. Do a good transformational program that will “kick-start” you in making new decisions and creating new references for yourself.

7. Surround yourself with loving and supportive people – particularly a good mentor – who will tell you the truth and give you good feedback to accelerate your progress towards getting back on your feet.

8. Do something once a day and one day a week that brings you pleasure. Exercise, ride your bicycle, spend time with your loved ones, watch your favorite program, read a novel… This is crucial to keep your spirits up.

9. Don’t make yourself wrong – forgive yourself for things that you think you could have done differently.

10. Keep taking action… Your life will turn around!

7 Powerful Principles Entrepreneurs Live By

entreprenuer principals

7 Powerful Principles Entrepreneurs Live By

by DC Cordova

In my program, Money & You®, we teach entrepreneurs, business professionals, salespeople, doctors, attorneys, alternative health care providers, engineers, scientists, writers, networking professionals, business owners, and many wealth gurus – you name them, we’ve taught them – how to live a principle-filled life based on the teachings of R. Buckminster Fuller, W. Edwards Deming, Georgi Lozanov, and many other pioneers of new thinking.

The creators of Money & You® are Bobbi DePorter and Marshall Thurber who, in the mid-1970’s, pioneered a never-before-seen Business School for Entrepreneurs that lasted six weeks!

The reasons why six weeks was a breakthrough – and continues to be – is because there wasn’t and still isn’t a school anything like it. They called it the Burklyn Business School for Entrepreneurs and it was first offered in Vermont in 1978. Later that year, they created Money & You®, designed to be five days that incorporated left-and-right-brain teaching techniques extensively researched in the post-war era economic expansion. It’s actually quite fun! If you like music, games, color and experiencing rather than sitting in a classroom, you’ll get it.

We’ve took our teaching and learning technology global, and now it is offered in North America, Australia, Singapore, Malaysia, Taiwan, Hong Kong and throughout China.

So, with that background on what Money & You® is, I’d like to share 7 POWERFUL Principles to live by (every successful entrepreneur I know lives by these principles).

  1. The Universe Will Not Deny You Anything. Only You Can Do That. -G.S.
    This is one of the most powerful principles I have learned and we teach. R. Buckminster Fuller referred to God as the Native Americans did – Great Spirit or G.S. For some of you this is easy – everything you have in your life right now – every relationship, money in the bank, your cars, pets, where you live, your attitude, your free time, your fulfillment – is completely what you’ve chosen! The Universe is abundant and there is only ONE PERSON who can deny you ANYTHING! YOU! Get this one and you’ll create freedom.
  2. Thinking Is the Hardest Thing You Can Do. That’s Why So Few People Engage In It. -Henry Ford
    Think about this one… When have you stopped yourself because it got “hard” to find the solution? Realize that you will be compensated in direct proportion to the size of the solution you solve.
  3. Integrity Is The Essence Of Everything (Successful). -R. Buckminster Fuller
    The human spirit has complete integrity. When you are out of touch with yourself, you may take some actions that are not congruent with what you know to be best. So, basically, integrity is something that “holds it’s own shape.” Take a look around you and see if there are things that are not working for you. And are you in complete integrity with yourself?
  4. 94% Of Problems Are System Based. Look To The System To Correct. -W. Edwards Deming
    W. Edwards Deming is known as the father of Quality Control. He is the reason why Toyota is known for quality. If the results in your business continue to suffer, the systems you have aren’t producing  your desired results. As they say in the computer world, “Garbage in, garbage out!” Well, with a bad system that’s not always true. You can have gold going in and garbage coming out. One of the co-creators of M&Y, Marshall Thurber, was an avid student of W. Edwards Deming. For more information on his work go to
  5. Clarity Leads To Power.
    As they used to say in the G.I. Joe cartoon, “Knowing’s half the battle!” When you are clear on your goals, your values, your mission – everything will begin to fall in place. It’s the decision in knowing what you want that sets you on the path. The “how” of making your goals come true will appear in miraculous moments.
  6. The Most Powerful Force I Have Is What I Say To Myself AND What I Believe.
    Your words create. Buckminster Fuller said, “Words are your most powerful tool.” Other teachers of ours share that we create with our words. And science is now validating that our thoughts are also physically affect the condition of our cells.
  7. There Are No Victims. Only Volunteers.
    Responsibility is removing all blame, shame and justification. When you take responsibility for the results you have, you truly learn the value in the learning experiences throughout your life. What do all those experiences have in common? You.

Creative Commons License photo credit: mborowick

The Homeless Man I “Adopted”


I have been living at the beach in San Diego since 1980…  It’s a beautiful area with cliffs, sunclipses, good-looking people, bicycles paths, and just about everything that a nature lover that lives in a city could want.

The area is filled with some pretty colorful characters and things – from million dollar homes overlooking the gorgeous clear (most days) ocean, to bikers, hippies, veterans, tourists, and homeless folks since they are allowed in this beach (can’t find them in La Jolla since they have strong “vagrancy” laws – and God forbid that the mega-rich should look at a reality that millions of people, including whole families, are homeless in America).

In our beachy area, we live with that fact – we feed them in the local churches, we take our leftovers during Thanksgiving – and we are grateful for our jobs, businesses and our good luck that we are not one of them. As we all know, it can happen to any one – and for some that can’t stand the thought, they would rather jump off a bridge than face the fact that they could become homeless.

It’s a tough reality to confront – and it’s something that some have learned to live with…

A couple of years ago, I noticed that there was a homeless man that was sleeping under the covered front door of a nice  “boutique” mortuary in our neighborhood.   Though I travel extensively for business, when I’d be home and driving by in the evenings, I’d notice him. A bundle on the ground with items around him – what looks like the comforts of a “makeshift” bedroom.

My heart would break a little every time I saw him – and instead of feeling sad about him and rationalizing that I contribute so much to different organizations that handle people like this gentle-man that obviously has had a dose of very bad luck, I chose to start including him in my life.

I started to bring him leftovers (I was careful to separate my food before eating so that it would be completely clean for him).  I started to think of little things to bring to him at times – including the wonderful on-flight pajamas that Air China provides for Business Class flyers.  On my last Thanksgiving I spent in the States a couple of years ago – though I knew that the local church would have had a nice turkey dinner for the folks that need it – I brought him a nice plate.

It was interesting at moments when I’d walk towards him – most of the time, he’d sit up and look and see who was heading his way – he had good instincts – I figured that he didn’t sleep that sound – who would sleeping on the streets?

I started to see him sitting there earlier at times – before dark – and I had a chance to see him sitting on the ledge of the front area of this mortuary.  I started to be thankful to this organization that obviously was allowing him to have a little area where he could rest at night.  I even started thinking of adding in my Will that they are the assigned business to turn my body into ashes when it’s time – ways of prospering them for their generosity of Spirit…  It was a daily reminder of the world that many live in – where Scarcity is king – Sufficiency is a dream – and Abundance is enjoyed by those that have an understanding of true abundance (and some greedy) as opposed to the masses.

In our Excellerated programs, we have taken many to this experience of Sufficiency and naturally they move to that experience of Abundance – many go on to contribute to others… it’s a wonderful experience.

Yes, I understand the “Law of Attraction”, karma  and destiny – and I will continue to ask the question:  in relationship to our connection to God, what is really our job here on Earth?

How do we live in peace / joy / abundance / love and allow for 27,000 plus people (mostly children) around the world to die daily of hunger, starvation, lack of clean water and electricity which doesn’t allow for basic medicines to be refrigerated, and this contributes to the spread of horrible diseases, where mothers helplessly watch their children die — some knowing that we have the medicines, knowledge and resources in “civilized” prosperous countries…

By now, I could be “bumming” you out – and thank YOU for reading this far – and this is a question that I live in:

We know that it has to do with political matters, with greed, with an old paradigm that has changed but most of the people in the world have not caught on…

I have this powerful belief that Americans are enraged with the corporate greed because though the likes of Donald Trump try to blame the Chinese for our problems, we are the ones that made the deals with them…  they provided cheap labor because they were hungry – and had a history that is so intense with hunger / starvation / and Imperialist invasions, that when one reads their history, their zealousness for wealth and having more starts to make sense in that paradigm.

In case you didn’t know, they make products to the EXACT specifications given to them, i.e. Apple Computer products vs. Walmart cheap products…  and along with our manufacturing, we have given them our pollution.  Next time you meet (or see) a Chinese national, bow and thank them for taking our toxic waste, our dirty air, and along all the environmental problems that come with the territory.

You don’t believe me?  Do a little research on why most blue jeans are dyed and manufactured in China…and the consequences of that… you may never buy another pair of blue jeans again!

All these thoughts would go around in my head when I’d see the homeless man that “I had adopted”.  And though I have served in homeless shelters, have delivered Thanksgiving boxes to poor families in the past, and have supported organizations committed to ending homelessness,  personalizing a homeless person is a tough thing to do – and I highly recommend it!

I miss the homeless man.  Since my last trip to the Orient, he’s no longer there.  I am hoping that he has found a new home and no longer needs that temporary spot.  I try to avoid the thought that he died in the cold, alone, on a hard-concrete ground with no one to hold his hand…  I am thinking of calling the mortuary to find out if they know what happened to the gentle-man that they so kindly allowed to be in their front door for years… I’ll let you know if I find out anything.

I have decided to share this story with you because I know how tough it is to ask these questions – and how much easier it’s to rationalize…  and I’ve decided to create a “new dream” as Don Miguel Ruiz (The Four Agreements) would say.

I’d like to invite you to come along and create a “new dream” where there’s Sufficiency and all human being in this world have a choice to have a roof over their heads, have the ability to earn a living, have 3 square meals a day, can send their children to school, have health care, and a little left-over to enjoy little vacations and entertainment…  and ultimately, have a little piece of mind, a smile on their face – and live in a safe world with loving peeps!

Thank YOU for reading this far…  every disenfranchised person on the planet THANKS YOU.

Check out for more information on the state of Homelessness in America.

Dame DC Cordova,
CEO, Excellerated Business Schools®

Financial Literacy Goes Beyond Knowing the Details.

money and finances - literacy

What part does financial literacy play in achieving our dreams?

If your dreams are to have a abundant life which includes a beautiful home (or homes), automobiles for yourself and your family, a great education for your children (and yourself), and a business that works like a money-making machine with systems in place that allow you to be financially free – receiving profits, royalties, rents – or to be financially independent from wise investments and your attention on them is minimal… there is no question that financial literary is key.

In the past over 30 years in working with people in our programs, including Money & You®, to discover what holds a person back from having money, building successful businesses, or having financial success – and this is with people in different parts of the world – over and over again it comes up that we must clear our consciousness from emotional blocks in order to receive the level of abundance that we desire; or to experience the wealth/the financial resources that we may already have.

There is no question that being educated about the basics of money; how to start, manage, build and expand a business is key. Financial literacy should be a subject taught in primary schools to children, along with reading, writing, grammar, math, and all key subjects necessary to be a fully-educated functioning human being – yet we are expected to learn to be financially literate without the proper guidance and by trial an error – thus, we have a society riddled with debt, fearful of the future and at times investing in projects that we know very little about – or enslaved to a job or a business that brings us very little profit or joy.

Financial literacy is as important as breathing, having clean water, and nutritious food for those who wish to have more than their basic needs met – and do not wish to be in debt. When we have the basic understanding – and later more sophisticated systems – of financial wealth, it allow us to grow our financial independence in a much greater pace, ease and with joy.

I congratulate you for reading my blog – for reaching out and learning from the different “masters” that are sharing their information. It is your “internal” guidance that has brought you here and now you are ready to go to a whole other level of financial gains.

Become a great student of financial literacy to allow you to have your dreams come true. Learn the different systems, and then choose the one that works best for you. Be sure to have financial advisors that have succeeded in their area of endeavor – and do what is congruent with your inner knowing and the knowledge that you have gathered through your educational process.

Do not leave the task of building your wealth to others – you can be supported by others, by financial wizards and master – but ultimately, you are responsible for your results. In our programs we say, “Education Is The Highest Form of Leverage”… you learn the techniques, the tools – and then you must allow yourself to be wealthy by clearing any blocks that may be in the way of your dreams coming true. That is the secret of many of the money/wealth gurus out there – how do I know? I was there as they were growing, clearing their blocks to the success that they now have – whether it is financial or in contributing to others. Financial literacy was key. May you also have your dreams come true – have a beautiful life and hopefully help others to do the same.

DC Cordova
CEO, Excellerated Business Schools®/Money and You Program®

Creative Commons License photo credit: Pink Sherbet Photography

What Would Bucky Say About Today’s Global Challenges?

Buckminster fullerFrom Bucky Fuller's book Grunch of Giants – Published in 1984:

The social revolution potential now can for the first time in history realize economic success for all and a comprehensive world enjoyment that involves not revengefully toppling the economically successful minority but elevating all humanity to a sustainable higher level of existing and interacting than any humans have heretofore either experienced or dreamed of.

The now-potentially-to-be-omni-successful social revolution could never before in history have been realized. Until 1970 there had always been enough physical resources but not enough metaphysical resources (of experience-won know-how) on our planet to render the physical technology capable of taking care of everyone at a sustainable, eminently successful level of physical well-being— bloodlessly accomplished and sustainable without the coexistence of either a human slave or working class. Until 1970 it had realistically to be either you or me, not enough for both. Since 1970 it has become realistically you and me—all else is automated acceleration to human-race extinction on planet Earth.

• • •

Never before in all history have the inequities and the momentums of unthinking money-power been more glaringly evident to so vastly large a number of now literate, competent, and constructively thinking all-around-theworld humans.

There's a soon-to-occur critical-mass moment when the intuition of the responsibly inspired majority of humanity, in contradistinction to the angered Luddites and avenging Robin Hoods, faced with comprehensive functional discontinuity of nationally contained techno-economic system, will call for and accomplish a world-around reorientation of our planetary affairs.

At this critical moment will occur a realization by the responsibly inspired majority that the adequate capacity of the invisible technology to sustainingly support all humanity depends on all the resources, physical and metaphysical, being always and only employed for all of world-around humanity as a completely integrated techno-economic system operating entirely on its daily income principally of Sun-emanating energy.

The integrated world-technoeconomic system purpose is in contradistinction to a union of 150 autonomously operating nation-states, as with the United Nations.

All this can now be comprehensively commonwealth-accounted in time-energy work units. All this can provide regenerative-initiative accommodating access of human individuals to the ever multiplying commonwealth-techno-economic facilities. The degree of individual-initiative computerized access to the commonwealth facilities will be predicated on the demonstrated performance and sustained integrity of the individual's ever-forwardly-anticipatory designing competence.

I have been a deliberate half-century-fused inciter of a cool-headed, natural, gestation-rate-paced revolution, armed with physically demonstrable livingry levers with which altogether to elevate all humanity to realization of an inherently sustainable, satisfactory-to-all, ever higher standard of living.

Critical threshold-crossing of the inevitable revolution is already underway. The question is: Can it be successfully accomplished before the only-instinctively-operating fear and ignorance preclude success, by one individual, authorized or unauthorized, pushing the first button of chain-reacting all-buttons-pushing, atomic, raceirradiated suicide?

The only happily promising recourse of each human individual is to our highest intellectual faculties and their mutual, ego-deflated, unselfishly loving preoccupation with comprehensivity and our employment of the most powerful tools of all:

* (A) the family of generalized scientific principles governing the operational design of eternally regenerative Universe itself;

* (B) comprehending and effectively employing synergetics, with the books Synergetics and Synergetics II presenting the comprehensive omni-image-able mathematical coordinate system employed by nature, thus avoiding the mentally debilitating, vastmajority-of-humanity-excluding quasimathematical coordinate system employed by present-day science;

* (C) comprehending the major objectives and operating strategies of the major opposing power structures of world politics, their present status quo and probable future trending;

* (D) comprehending the fundamentals of economics, of wealth vs. money, of the principal features and functioning of industry, banking, and securities;

* (E) comprehending the educational system in general as well as the discovery of the shortcomings of science, engineering, and education in general;

* (F) synergetically comprehending “what it is all about,” as propounded in Critical Path and this book, Grunch of Giants, and discovering what our options are to confront imminent race disaster; and

* (G) the individual discovery of God by a vast majority of human individuals—not the discovery of religions, but the discovery that each and every individual has an always-instantly-open, no-intermediary-switchboard-authority-to-contend-with, no-interferenceof-any-kind, direct “hot-line to God”: i.e., the weightless, nonphysical communication occurring teleologically between the differentially limited, weightless, nonphysical, temporal, special-case mind of the individual human and the comprehensively integrated, macro-micro unlimited, weightless, eternal, generalized mind of God.

You can read the complete book here. It's a fascinating read and relevant to today's global economic challenges.

What Else Are We Missing?

A Story of a musician

Washington, DC Metro Station on a cold January morning…

A man with a violin plays six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time approx. 2 thousand people passed through the station, most of them on their way to work.

After 3 minutes a middle-aged man noticed there was a musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds and then hurried to meet his schedule.

4 minutes later:
The violinist received his first dollar: a woman threw the money in the hat and, without stopping, continued to walk.

6 minutes:
A young man leaned against the wall to listen to him, then looked at his watch and started to walk again.

10 minutes:
A 3-year old boy stopped but his mother tugged him along hurriedly. The kid stopped to look at the violinist again, but the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk, turning his head all the time. This action was repeated by several other children. Every parent, without exception, forced their children to move on quickly.

45 minutes:
The musician played continuously.  Only 6 people stopped and listened for a short while. About 20 gave money but continued to walk at their normal pace. The man collected a total of $32.

1 hour:
He finished playing and silence took over. No one noticed. No one applauded, nor was there any recognition.

No one knew this, but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the greatest musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin valued at $3.5 million dollars. Two days before, Joshua Bell sold out a theater in Boston where the price of seats averaged $100.

This is a true story. Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and people’s priorities.

The questions that was raised: in a commonplace environment at an inappropriate hour, do we perceive beauty? Do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize talent in an unexpected context?

One possible conclusion reached from this experiment could be this:

If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world, playing some of the finest music ever written, with one of the most beautiful instruments ever made… what else are we missing?

Build a Tower, Build a Team…

A good video from TED on building teams.

Tom Wujec presents surprisingly deep research into the “marshmallow problem” — a simple team-building exercise that involves dry spaghetti, one yard of tape and a marshmallow. Who can build the tallest tower with these ingredients? And why does a surprising group always beat the average?

Tom Wujec is a Fellow at Autodesk, the makers of design software for engineers, filmmakers, designers. At Autodesk, he has worked on software including SketchBook Pro, PortfolioWall and Maya (which won an Academy Award for its contribution to the film industry). As a Fellow, he helps companies work in the emerging field of business visualization, the art of using images, sketches and infographics to help teams solve complex problems as a group.

He’s the author of several books, including Five-Star Mind: Games and Puzzles to Stimulate Your Creativity and Imagination.

A Conversation with John Mackey of Whole Foods Market – an Entrepreneur With Heart

A Conversation with John Mackey of Whole Foods Market – an Entrepreneur “With Heart”…

As I am preparing to attend John Mackey’s C3 Summit, a event empowered by John Mackey, I wanted to give you a glimpse of this wonderful entrepreneur’s mind (and heart) set…

John has devoted the better part of his 56 years to the seemingly friendly and peace-loving world of selling natural foods. He has lived in a vegetarian co-op and studied yoga and meditation. He is a leading practitioner of empowerment management. Yet, as CEO of Whole Foods Market, Inc. he has built an $8 billion Fortune 500 company that is now one of the top 20 supermarket companies in America. He has out-maneuvered nearly every other entrant into the natural foods marketplace, eventually purchasing most of them. No wonder Business Week entitled its 1998 profile of Mackey: “Peace, love, and the bottom line.”

Responsibility Can Really Suck…


by Bill J. McCarley

In December 1983, I decided to venture out on my own and left my job at Texas Instruments. My wife, Linda, had finished her doctorate program and had started a psychotherapy practice. We had a 9 year old daughter and a 7 month old daughter. After beginning my consulting practice, Linda’s business partner told me about a program being presented in Colorado called Money and You. It seemed like a good idea to do this program, so in March 1984 I flew there to attend it.

To my surprise, I discovered the most important information I have learned in this lifetime… The Responsibility Flipchart!

On Thursday night we played a wild game with Xs and Ys called, “Win as Much as You Can”. I knew the purpose of the game was to play Win-Win and that is what I did! When the game ended, Marshall Thurber, the program originator, collected the scores. He took a slow look at them; then turned and asked, “who got this minus 66?” My partner and I raised our hands and got singled out as the ones with the biggest losing score. Marshall next asked, “What happened?” I proceeded to tell him what was wrong with the other partnerships in my group, and he pointed to LAY BLAME on the chart. I moved up the chart to JUSTIFY and told him why I had played the game the way I did. He wrote the word RIGHT on a new page and let me know I was right.

For a moment I felt better knowing I was right, but then he added a few more letters… RIGHTEOUS. Now this guy I didn’t know was calling me righteous in front of the entire group. I was not happy and felt very agitated. The evening went on and eventually I was back in my room, pacing back and forth and ranting about how Marshall had mistreated me. Like a bolt of lighting, it hit me that he was totally correct, and I was being righteous in that very moment.

I lost the game… but got the lesson!

I became completely committed to the practice of personal responsibility and have made it a lifelong activity and study. I joined Money & You's Instructor Training Program and eventually became a promoter of Money and You. I also trained with Robert Kiyosaki when he was leading Money and You.

I continually teach people about personal responsibility and how freedom is impossible without it. It became completely clear to me that it is easy to assume responsibility when things are going the way you want them to go. However, the mind is totally committed to being “below the line” when something does not seem right. I began to see how trying to move up the chart and get past JUSTIFY leads a person to blaming themselves instead of others or the situation. I began to recognize this as Lay Blame on Self. About the time I began to consider this new distinction, we decided to promote Marshall’s new workshop on Dr. Deming’s material and when Marshall introduced “The Responsibility Flipchart”, he had added the word SHAME above JUSTIFY.

Trying to move above JUSTIFY mostly leads to asking ourselves the question, “What’s wrong with me?” Of course, this is not a very empowering question and still not “above the line”.

On my journey through life, I have found more teachers who offer key lessons in what personal responsibility really is and how to assume it and take it: Bucky Fuller, Dr. Deming, Tony Robbins, Esther Hicks (who channels Abraham,) the Dalai Lama, Lester Levinson (originator of The Releasing Technique and The Sedona Method), Dr. Hew Len (who teaches Ho’oponopono,) and others, as well.

I now define responsibility as “owning the power to create, choose, and attract”. You are in fact creating, choosing, or attracting everything in your life… ALL the time. As Abraham, through the voice of Esther Hicks, puts it, “It is all you… only you… no exceptions.”

When things are working, responsibility is great!

When things are not working, it is hard to own that you are the cause without stopping at Shame (laying blame on yourself.) Being at Shame is when responsibility really sucks. I teach that it is critical to skip right over that place on the chart and take 100% Responsibility…. not the Blame!

Then you can own the power that you have and be fully “above the line”.

About the author:
Bill J. McCarley is a long time supporter of Money and You and its powerful principles. He trained with Marshall Thurber and Robert Kiyoskai to lead Money and You. He even taught a slightly modified version in a corporate setting. He promoted Money and You, Creating Wealth and Powerful Presentations in Austin, Texas from 1987 – 1992. His company Co-evolution is committed to personal development, business development, and more recently Web development. Web site:

Lessons On Resolving Conflict.

A great video on conflict from William L. Ury co-founded Harvard's Program on Negotiation and is currently a Senior Fellow of the Harvard Negotiation Project.

With the Holidays upon us, it's a timely message. When we learn to resolve conflict peacefully and in a manner, we see positive change in the world around us.

“… normally when we think of conflict, when we describe it, there's always two sides. It's Arabs versus Israelis, labor versus management, husband versus wife, Republicans versus Democrats, but what we don't often see is that there's always a third side. And the third side of the conflict is us, it's the surrounding community, it's the friends, the allies, the family members, the neighbors. And we can play an incredibly constructive role. Perhaps the most fundamental way in which the third side can help is to remind the parties of what's really at stake. For the sake of the kids, for the sake of the family, for the sake of the community, for the sake of the future, let's stop fighting for a moment and start talking. Because, the thing is, when we're involved in conflict, it's very easy to lose perspective. It's very easy to react. Human beings: we're reaction machines. And as the saying goes, when angry, you will make the best speech you will ever regret. And so the third side reminds us of that. The third side helps us go to the balcony, which is a metaphor for a place of perspective, where we can keep our eyes on the prize”